The other day, I was scanning the Nielson Primetime Ratings, and I noticed the 378 different CSI or CSI-inspired shows rising in popularity. I also noticed shows like Cold Case--where a young woman decides to reopen 40-year-old dead-end cases and single-handedly solve them, despite the impossibility of gaining new evidence--in the top slots. Same with Threat Matrix, the show about the exciting and deadly life of a normal Homeland Security clerk.

What's the common thread between all these shows, you ask? Why, making an "exciting" (and I use the term very loosely) show based around characters who work in boring, everyday jobs. No longer is the American TV-watching public content with watching shows about superheroes or people with extraordinary skills. No! the public wants to see shows about dumb slobs just like themselves--people who, despite it all, still manage to get the bad guy. People want to be able to relate to these "average Joe's"; seeing someone with a worse job than your own raises peoples' morales and feelings of self-worth.

So I first thought of a show I'd call Filing In. The premise is simple: we'd take five normal people with no accounting backgrounds, and place them in charge of filing tax forms for the five largest brokerage firms in the country. The company is facing an audit, and the five much attempt to fill out the tax forms or else the company will do bankrupt. Succeed, and they'll be rewarded with a nice pat on the back from the fat, uber-wealthy CEO. Fail, and their families will die, plain and simple. Watch as these five people struggle with meeting the deadline! Sweat as they try to make sense of the overly-complicated forms! Sigh as they are finally reunited with their recently-kidnapped families--or, gasp as the families are executed, brutally, on live national television!

My next idea was to take fifteen strangers, place them in southcentral LA, and have them form a gang which directly competes with the Bloods and the Crips. I'd call it Turf Warz (and the "z" means the show--produced by whitey--is in touch with the urban segment). The newly-formed gang much compete with the other gangs for supremacy through whatever means necessary. They are declared the winners--and given solid gold chains with the gang symbol--when the other gangs are dismantled, or its members are all killed or in jail. They lose if they are killed or go to jail. "In a dog-eat-dog world, it's best to be on top in the Turf Warz."

Lastly, I thought of a good show where we take beautiful celebrities, and force them to work for minimum at a dead-end job. The only catch is that we give them some kind of horrible deformity. The deformities are all permenant and job-specific. Working at McDonalds? Chop off their thumbs. Wanna work at a crappy bookstore? Get in line for your lobotomy. Come laugh as Ben Affleck tries to bus tables at a restaurant after we poke out one of his eyes, thus screwing up his depth perception! See Liv Tyler attempt to work at a tatoo parlor after we numb the nerve endings on her hands and fingers! If you've ever wondered what happens when we take celebrities out of their element--and then keep them there--then Tough Break is the show for you!